Jesus, please mention my name....

...I cry in front of my pain.

Check please.

Change is NOW

"Surround yourself with people who bring out the God in you...you need those people to push you forward" -Pastor Furtick

Have you had one of those moments where you lift your hands in the air and you just start praising Him? 

THIS season has been a season of vulnerability which has lead to uneasiness within me.  Funny how I picked a word for 2019 and it makes nervous, anxious and everything in between (vulnerability). 

Past Furtick had an amazing message in his "I'm Confused About My Calling/Maybe God".  Pastor Furtick spoke about relationships and most of all the relationship with God. 

I know that God placed key people in my life to pray for me, uplift me, empower me and stand by side during this season (as well as others). 

Vulnerability leads to change...

God, I'm listening......

Check please.

It's been awhile....but I haven't left you

I am at the opening of my, "light at the end of the tunnel".  It is bright and almost clear as day.  It has taken me several months to even begin to see the light but GOD.  Blessed am I that God has surrounded me with God fearing women.  Truly, I don't know what I would do in life without them.  For the past several months I've been enthralled with my own circumstance that I missed the hurt of the women who I adore around me. 

Fabulous One: Dealing with the decision to start a family when infertility is an issue
Fabulous Two: Deciding to get married to a man who has cheated on you and taking the leap of faith that through therapy and prayer getting married is the right decision
Fabulous Three: Dealing with a husband who chooses to put his child from a previous relationship first above your marriage
Fabulous Four: Dealing with the death of her mother after finding out she had cancer a few short weeks prior
Fabulous Five: The last time we spoke, *I need to call and check on her* finding your happy place in a life of on the go while praying for your grandson health and home life. 


We all need a quick prayer, thought, comfort and uplifting word. 

After reading Proverbs 31 today....I felt His warmth and love.  It ended with this-

Dear Father, thank You for chasing me with Your love. Open my eyes to Your personal pursuit of my heart. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.


May this be true for everyone who comes here. 

Check please.

Best Case Scenario....


....God can change my circumstance at any moment in my life.  "Best Case Scenario" we live happily imperfectly ever after.  I'm good with that. 

What's your best case scenario?


Check please.

Let me keep you at arms length....

Sweet. Baby. Jesus.


I've seen this twice now.


Here is my answer:

-Abandonment


My (1) short answer.


-Check please

Aunt Flo it's 2018....seriously

When you receive that text message from a dear friend that reads, "Flo usually shows up late afternoon BUT #sheearly". 

My response, "Flo needs to learn how to send text messages"....LMAO

Ladies, wouldn't it be genius if Aunt Flo could send us a text message regarding our periods?!?!?!

They should read something like this:

#notpregnantseeyounextmonth

#closecallbutgodhandledit

#whatupimearly

#chocolateandsleep

#callinyoufeeldead

#getyourmidolSTAT

#notshowingup

#takepregnancytest


What would Aunt Flo say to you?

Lighter days...

God bless "Brave Girls Club" and their ministry.  Every time I open my "a little bird told me...." I promise you it is God whispering in my ear.  Do you ever have those moments?  The better question is do we listen. 

I'm on a continuous journey of learning, listening and being submissive to Him.  Insert deep breathe. I am terrible at ALL three. 

The other day I was keeping the world at arms length.  Arms length.  I can't save the world.  Arms length.  I don't want to hear or listen to your problems.  Arms length.  I am taking a moment for me.  Arms length.  I don't want to be bothered.

It's true. 

I can have a conversation with any and everyone. 

It's true.

I don't like everyone. 

And...that's okay. 

I am coming into my truth of...I can't manage all the outcomes. 

This is a new moment of contentment in my life.....I can't.  I won't. 

-Check please

Finding contentment in the question mark....

What is your question mark?

I read this statement today from @thechampaynediet on instagram today.  If you have the change stop by her page on instagram or visit her at www.carralwill.com.  

For me....my question mark is many.  Sheesh.  Where do I start?

At a pivotal point in my life where I am reinventing myself, making me the better version of me, being me apologetically, being okay with not being liked, being comfortable in my skin and making the best moves in life for me.  

Sounds selfish, right?!?!?!

YES!!!  You are absolutely right.  Being selfish towards myself doesn't mean that I can't appreciate others within my life.  It is me saying that I am putting myself first (emotionally, physically and mentally).  It is me saying, I can't be a benefit to you if I put myself last.  

AND that means....me not having to explain why I am being me!!!!

So as Cara has reminded us as women.....get your best glass of bubbly and let's do this!

-Check please 

"Every good story has conflict....

...what seems futile and hopeless gains meaning."

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (Genesis 50:20, NIV).

God, you sure do give me winks when I am discouraged.  


Yesterday and today I wanted to write something horrible, my broken heart and dissatisfaction with my current circumstance.  After reading my daily, Proverbs31 email....well, the hug You just gave me let me know I can keep going a little bit longer. 

Thank you God for your everlasting love and grace.  I may be a hard headed, throw my hands up, I can do bad all by myself child of Yours but I thank you. 


“For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.” (Corinthians 4:17)

Check please.....

Taking me back....

Today is the day. 


FEAR IS A LIAR!!!!! 


Today, I take me back. 

It feels so good to say....taking me back!  Try it?  There is something powerful about taking your life back and moving forward in your skin.  My struggle always is deep rooted in what/how others perceive me.  I am just-because-I-talk-to-you-doesn't-mean-I-like-you; HOWEVER, don't dislike me either types. 

But today....I am doing it for me. 

#unapologeticallyme

Check please....

Dear God...

In talking with Jesus, He reminds me that You are bigger than the problem. In these past several months I have to remind myself that "fear is the lie" and that You said, "You will neither forsake me or leave me".  I'll admit. At times I feel alone.  In this season I feel more alone than ever.  Everyday I am surrounded by people but I feel alone.  It's like in the movies when you are going through the emotions and life around is flying by.  

There are amazing things going on in my life currently and I can't enjoy them because of the problem.  

The problem has taken front and center of life and I am beyond pissed the **** off at it.  

And everyone is suffering...everyone.  

Check please....